MARRIAGE IN EDO LAND

Discussing marriage in Edo land would definitely require a definition of the
Edos, especially in view of discussions that are taking place right now.
Who are the Edos?  Where are they located? Where did they come from?    A
lot of theories have been propounded by different scholars and academicians
in this regards.   Put briefly, the Edo-speaking  people are the people who
founded an empire on the coast of West Africa, stretching through the "
whole of the then Midwestern part of Nigeria, parts of the southwest region
of modern Oyo, Ondo, Ogun, Ekiti and Lagos states.  The eastern end
stretched across the Niger River into the commercial region of Onitsha.  It
was bounded in the north by the Igala kingdom now Kogi state on the
confluence of the Niger and Benue.  This empire was bounded in the south by
the Atlantic Ocean, and as far west as the ancient kingdom of Dahomey, now
known as the  Republic of Benin, "  ( Introduction in IBOTA: A Collection of
Folk tales from Benin By Ademola Iyi-Eweka)  This empire spilled into the
Izon (ijaw-speaking areas) of Bayelsa and River states of Nigeria especailly
Ogbaland and DIOBU areas of  modern day Port Harcourt and Ghana ( the Gas ).
Remember that the second son of the Enogie of Brass in modern Balyesa state
became the Iyase of Benin.  He is fondly remembered as IYASE NE OHENMWEN.

Chief Egharevba took a shot at the origin of the Edos.   He simply concluded
and agreed with the theory of Rev Samuel Johnson, author of the History of
the Yorubas, who desperately trying to write the history of the yoruba with
UNITY in mind, simply crafted the history of the yorubas in the form of the
HAUSA/FULANI FLAG BEARER THEORY.   Chief Egharevba was wrong.   In reaction,
the Edo nationalistic politician, Chief Oronsaye  tried to undo what he
termed as Egharevba's damage.   He too went overboard.  Chief Oronsaye
taking the RELIGIOUS ROUTE, simply compiled what looked liked fairy tales,
without any proof whatsoever, and turned it into the history of the Edos.

Here is my comment about Chief Oronsaye's theory in the introduction to
OKHOGISO, A COLLECTION OF FOLKTALES FROM BENIN, NIGERIA by Ademola Iyi-Eweka:

" This brings us to the question of who the Edo people are and where they
came from.  Although some contemporary historians, tend to associate the Edo
people with the migration theory of people who came from the Middle East, we
have to point that there is no evidence in Benin or anywhere else to support
that theory.  Again, Chief D.N. Oronsaye, apparently using religious motifs,
lumped the EDO with the Greeks, Persians, Medes, Egyptians, Nubians, and the
Sudanese.  He linked the Edo religion to the ZOROASTRIAN TEMPLE of ancient
Persia, the BROTHERHOOD OF BABYLONIAN( CHALDEA), the secret cults of the 5th
and 4th century B.C. Greece.   There is the tradition that Benin City is the
CRADDLE OF MANKIND, the center of the universe, or a place where the creator
God sometimes came down in a chain ladder to get involved in the affairs of
mankind.    This is shown in the title borne by some chiefs.    There is a
sizeable group, though, who can trace their origin to UHE which is
identified as modern day ILE-IFE.   They came with legendary Oranmiyan (
Omonoyan) , the father of Oba Eweka I between 1000 AD and 1200 AD."
This group is represented by the CHIEFS EDIGIN OF USE, BAMAWO OF BENIN AND
ELAWURE OF USEN.   Infact Edigin is a corruption  of the yoruba word
OLIGI-THE HEAD OF THE FIREWOOD CUTTERS in Oranmiyan's entourage.   They were
left to take care of the infant boy who became Oba Eweka I.

And I commented further: " We have to point out again that the appearance of
similarities between Edo religious thought  and practices to that of ancient
civilizations of 5th to 3rd centuries B.C or older time is most likely a
mere coincidence.   The Edo language according to linguist belongs to the
KWA group of the Niger-Congo family.  The greatest influence on Edo
religious thought and practices could be traced to the Portuguese, Spanish
Roman Catholic Missionaries and European traders who were very active in
Benin Religion, wars and political systems between the 14th and 19th
centuries A.D."       Besides, religious concept spread like wild fire.  You
do not have to be conquered or occupied for neighboring communities to copy
religious practices of one another.   You do not also need a wave of
migration.  

R. Bradbury, the author of BENIN STUDIES was right when he wrote the following:
" There are many villages in the Benin Kingdom whose inhabitants have no
tradition that their ancestors came from elsewhere.   Some informants speak
vaguely of general migration from the east and others trace everything back
to IFE---a tendency which may simply follow from the fact IFE is the
accepted origin of the present ruling dynasty.   In Benin City,  certain
wards claim to have been on the spot from the beginning, but of the
remainder say that their founders came from Ife as followers of the father
of the first Oba or at a later date. 

Therefore, despite the diggings by archeologists in and around Benin City,
none had said with certainty that the Edos came from Egypt, Sudan or
elsewhere.  We have the EDO ORE ISI OGHE AGBON (Edorisiagbon) school and the
UHE school of thought.    The Mid-east theory is an attempt to link the
African tribes to the biblical ADAM AND EVE.
The Edo-speaking people of West Africa, especially in Southern Nigeria, have
lived where they are now,  for THOUSANDS OF YEARS.    The beginning of Edo
history is lost in antiquity-in a mythical time frame work.
Edo history did not begin from the 7th century A.D.  People have moved in
and out.  The Edo people people did not migrate en-masse from Sudan, Egypt,
Babylon, or Greece.  It is doubtful if they even emigrate in waves.  Chief
Jacob Egharevba in chapter one of his book BINI Titles (1956), quoted his
source as P Amaury Talbot, " According to P.Amaury Talbot in his Book " The
Peoples of Southern Nigeria," Vol.II Chapter. Paragraph 6 and 7: "
Considerably later, perhaps about the seventh millennium B.C., a further wave
of Sudanese People began to pour in , first  the Edo ( Benin) and EWE (Popo)
and then the Ibo, followed may be about the second millennium B.C.by the
earliest Yoruba."    Then he gave his own interpretation-" Perhaps in a more
correct phrase, " The Sudanese, therefore come first-Yoruba, Popo, Edo
(Benin), Ijaw and Ibo, then the Semi-Bantu Ibibio, Ukelle and other tribes
of the Northwest followed by the Boki, Ekoi, and Bafumbu-Bansaw; and finally
the Bantu."   Almost every African tribe came from the Mid-east.   

For thousands of years, Edos have been getting married.   It is unfortunate
that , there is no more powerful corresponding word in Edo lexicon than
ORONMWEN,  that captures the meaning of the word MARRIAGE,  as in the
anglosaxon sense.  The closest word we have is ORONMWEN    All we have are
descriptive phrases about marriage-
" Okhia ye omo ye oronmwen,"-he wants to give the daughter away in MARRIAGE.
" Okhia rie Okhuo,"- he wants to marry a woman.
" Okhia romwen odo," she wants to marry a husband
But sometimes an Edo man/ person would say, " Ma khia du ugie oronmwen," we
want to perform the festival of marriage.

Before 1897, girls were generally regarded as ready for marriage between the
ages of 15 through 18.   Courtship can begin among the individuals during
the trip to the river to fetch water or during the moonlight play-EVIONTOI.
But sometimes parents actually go looking for a wife or husband for their
children.    This led to the BETROTHAL SYSTEM where marriage were conducted
with or without the consent of the individuals involved.  Sometimes such
betrothal, took place when a baby girl was born.   Suitors would begin to
approach the parents by sending a log of wood or bundle of yams to the
parents of the child.   You are likely to hear statements such as -" Imu'
Ikerhan gboto"-I have dropped a log of firewood.    When a boy decides to
get married and the parents have accepted the bride as a prospective
daughter-in-law, messages go up and down between the two families.  This is
called IVBUOMO-SEEKING FOR A BRIDE.   Series of investigations are conducted
by both families-about disease, scandals and crimes which may affect the
families.   The term of the marriage which of course may include the DOWRY
would be settled in some families. Gifts for mother of the bride and
IROGHAE- members of the extended family would be part of the settlement.
Then a date would be set for the ceremony which would take place in the home
of the woman's family.   This was called IWANIEN OMO in the old days  The
go-between for the two families must be somebody well known by both
families.   There would of course be a lot of merriment on the day of
marriage when the bride and the bridegroom are presented openly to the two
families.    Kola nuts and wine are presented    The OKA EGBE of the woman's
family would normally preside over the ceremony.    Prayers are said  and
kola nuts broken at the family shrine.

Rituals vary from family to family.   The woman always sit on her father's
lap before she is given away.    Amidst prayers, laughter and sometimes
tears, the woman would be carefully hoisted on the lap of the OKA EGBE of
the bride's family.  Many years ago, the woman would be sent to the
bridegroom house  about thirteen days after IWANIEN OMO and gingerly hoisted
either on her husband's lap or the OKAEGBE of  his family.    They are done
immediately nowadays in the home of the bridegroom.
The bride,  now known as OVBIOHA would be led by her relatives to the
husband's house with all her property   Meanwhile the family and friends of
the bridegroom are feasting,drinking, singing and dancing while waiting for
the bride to arrive.   As the family and friends of the bridegroom awaits
the OVBIOHA, messages will arrive suggesting that there are
UGHUNGHUN-barriers on the road.  The bridegroom has to remove the barriers
by sending money to the party,  bringing the wife to him or else the wife
will not arrive

As they approach the house of the bridegroom, you can hear the echo of
OVBIOHA GHA MIEN ARO-ARO, meaning " Bride ! be proud/ the Bride is proud."
Arrival at the bridegroom's house is immediately followed by the ceremony of
IKPOBO-OVBIOHA-washing of the bride's hands.  A bowl of water with money in
it would be brought out. A woman in the bride's family, sometimes his senior
wife would bring out a new head tie, wash the hand of the  Ovbioha in the
bowl and dries her hand with the head tie.  Both the new headtie and the
money in the bowl belong to the bride.     

A few days later,  the bride would taken to the family altar and prayers are
said for her.  She undergoes what is called the IGBIKHIAVBO ceremony-beating
of OKRO on the falt mortar.   This would be followed by a visit by the
bride's mother-in-law  and other female members of the family  to the newly
wed,  if they are not living in the same house.    She would demand the
bed-spread on which they both slept when they had their " first sexual
relationship " after the wedding.    If the bed-spread was stained with
blood, the bride was regarded as a virgin and she would be given many
presents including money.    If it is proven that she was not a virgin, then
the preparation for the ceremony of IVIHEN-OATH TAKING ceremony would be set
in motion.    First, she has has to confess to the older women,  the " other
men " in her life before she got married.    The husband would never be told
any of her confessions.     Then,  she would  be summoned to the family
shrine early in the morning , without warning to take an oath of  FIDELITY,
FAITHFULNESS, TRUSTWORTHINESS, HONESTY ETC,  to her husband and family.
This ceremony is the equivalent of the oath people take in the church,
mosque or marriage registry.  Once the oath taking ceremony is over, she
would be fully accepted into the family.    She immediately becomes married
not only to her husband but to the family and sometimes to the community.

Christianity, Islam and Westernization has already weaken the Edo
traditional system of marriage  The traditional ceremony,  is sometimes done
the same day with many of the rituals avoided in the name of Christianity or
Islam.
Many women would rather die than take the oath we described above.  It was
the oath that kept our women out of prostitution for many years.  Edo women
were regarded as very faithful, trustworthy, honest with strong fidelity to
their husbands.    Neighboring tribes wanted them as wives.   It made
divorce on the ground of adultery, less common in those days.   The scourge
of prostitution which has eaten deep into Edo women's life ( as reported in
the news media) should be placed on the shoulders of Christianity, Islam and
Westernization. 

Ademola Iyi-Eweka